Tug-of-War

As my time in Ruston reaches its end, I feel a tug-of-war emotionally.  Polly and I are leaving behind family, friends, and our church. 

I think if Plette hadn't just left I wouldn't feel quite as ready to leave as well.  I feel a little bit like the last man standing, even though that will actually be Jake when I leave.  I realized yesterday that no one is left that I was friends with freshman year except Jake, and of course Beggs.  However, I don't see them much these days anyway.

I miss the heck out of the blue house boys, Plette, Bailey, Christian, Potts, and others.  I think that living in Ruston just makes their absence in my daily life more obvious.  

Then there is my job. Man- I really do hate my job. I'm a college grad and my job title has the word "boy" in it. I am surely struggling with rage because of the disrespect I am surrounded with at work. I should take it as a lesson in humility, but man it's hard for me.

Looking forward, I am so excited to move to Alaska with my wife, and then move to Branson with my wife. I'm excited about going to the Kanakuk Institute.


Peace out Ruston.... is tugging me one way.


Then I'm reminded of what I do still enjoy here. My family- Jeremy(the president), Emery(first lady), and Luke(first baby), and of course Phoebe.

Also, my church which has been a home base for me in hard times and in great times.

My wife and I walked out of College Life for the last time yesterday, and I was really really sad.  But even through the sadness I feel encouraged by what I saw as I cast one last glance at the scene of post college life social circles.

I think back to my freshman year when College Life was "Access" and was held on Tuesday nights. There was probably an average crowd of 12-15 in a circle while Jordan Smith led worship on acoustic guitar. I remember feeling like I was pretty tight with all the people in attendance.

Now, College Life is way different, but still so good. To an old guy, it seems fresh and packed with potential. I want to stay and still be a part of the worship service that I love so much. It is so full of life and growing.

Then there are great friends that I've become so close to in these recent years and months.I have so much hope in the guys that I have gotten to mentor. That they will be men of God. Men of integrity. I want to stay and see what they do for the rest of their time in Ruston.

And to be honest. I like my house, and only paying $375 to rent it ain't bad at all.


I'm comfortable here, so why not stay... is tugging me back.


I have no doubt as to whether I will stay or leave. I have both loved and hated living in Ruston, but it is very clear to me that the time has come for Polly and I to leave. I don't know if 1 person will read this blog, but if anyone who I've known while I've lived in Ruston reads this; I'd like to say that it has been a pleasure.

*picture me and Polly on the back of the train with deuces held high....you're yelling good-bye, but we can't hear you because the train won't quit blowing that damn horn.